March 2026 – Choosing to Forgive… Part of the Process…!

Many of you know that I have been doing a study on forgiveness this year. I got stuck partway through the study… it was on the part where I actually had to write out everything that I needed to forgive. The activity included writing the person’s name, what they did, and how it affected me. With everything going on with Matthew’s health and the insanity of testing season at work… I didn’t have the mental/emotional capacity to add more to my plate… so my study sat… stuck at this point for quite some time. I knew that I needed to do it. The act of forgiving is more about freeing myself than anything else and that is why I am doing this study. I do not want them to have so much power over me. I don’t want the emotions to control me. I don’t want to live with so much pain. But at the same time is so hard.

This weekend I finally had the time to work through every hurt that has built up. All the pain that I experienced when I was in Norway. Everything that has resulted from that… it was hard to sit and write it all down. I also included some of the pain from the past that has popped back up that I wanted to forgive again.

After writing down each experience… we were to acknowledge that not always are we capable of releasing all the emotions that go with the pain. So, what we can’t let go of, we were to say, “whatever my feelings won’t yet allow for, the blood of Jesus will surely cover.” I forgive, not because it comes natural to me… I forgive, because I have been forgiven. I put each of these hurts into an envelope that symbolized that Jesus was covering what I could not. 

Working through the process...

I wore my Norway sweatshirt on purpose...

to process everything that took place during our trip.

After all was said and done… I utilized the fire that I have been enjoying to toss it all into the fire. God refines so much by fire… and He can take all the pain and purify it. He can make me whole again. He can make beauty from the ashes. I am trusting that He will bring about complete healing in my life. 

Taking it further... and burning it all up...

Watching God turn it to ashes... 

 

I am going to continue on through the process of forgiveness and healing… am I at the place where I want restoration? No… but I am choosing to forgive and leave it at Jesus’ feet. When the feelings creep back up, I will lay it back down at Jesus feet. I will continue on with the process. I will pray for the other person, but I will keep my boundaries up and protect my heart. For now, I am in a place of peace.