“Forgiveness
is no easy undertaking. I know that. I
have experienced a series of unrelated ‘offenses’—most of them relatively small,
but each one difficult to swallow. A
couple of these injuries have hit me at particularly tender places, painfully
resurfacing some difficult relationships and issues I had thought were in the
past—like breaking a scab not quite fully healed. In spite of the fact—or because of the
fact—that I have spent the last several months immersed in the subject of
forgiveness, I have found myself in an intense battle—my emotions and my flesh
desperately wanting to harbor the hurt, nurse the wounds, and ‘punish’ those
who inflicted them, while the Spirit within me keeps gently insisting, ‘Let it
go! Forgive… forbear… press the delete button!’”
I
know exactly how the author feels… because I too went through experiences that
brought all the feelings back up to the surface while I was doing this
study. One experience in particular
shattered my heart to pieces… all the hope that I had that things would get
better… that reconciliation would be possible… came crashing down around me…
and as I lay there with my heart barren before God… crying out to Him… He asked
me whether or not I would “let it go and forgive.” I can’t hold onto the hurts of the past or
even those of the present and walk in forgiveness at the same time. This study has been so good for me… not just
doing it alone and reflecting on it in my own life but doing it with a group of
people who are also struggling with their own issues. It reminded me that I am not alone… I don’t
have to walk this path of forgiveness alone… I never did… it was just my pride
that kept people at a distance when I needed them the most.
“As I have
wrestled with these matters, my heart has been haunted—hounded—by the words I
have written on theses pages. And in
this fresh test, I have had to make a choice, tough as it is, to relinquish any
right to hold onto the hurt or to be a debt collector. I have had to bow to God’s sovereignty,
accept each wound as a necessary, sanctifying gift, and receive His grace to
choose the pathway of forgiveness. To do
otherwise would be to sign my own prison sentence and would be a grievous
offense against God, even more so in light of how much He has forgiven me! Perhaps your journey through these pages has
surfaced some difficult issues and emotions, reminding you again—as if you
needed reminding—that forgiveness is indeed a costly endeavor. But I hope and
pray that what really stands out in your mind, as it does in mine now more than
ever, is the grace available to us through our relationship with Jesus
Christ—ample and all-sufficient, complete in every way, pressed down and
running over for those who are ready to walk out of the prison of bitterness,
ready to lay down our arms and our resistance… ready to forgive others as we
have been forgiven.”
As
I have been doing this study, I have wrestled with the need to forgive… I have
had to forgive hurts from the past as well as fresh hurts. Forgiveness is a choice… often it is a choice
we have to make on a daily basis. We are
so consumed with our own thoughts and how things affect us that we take things
personally even when someone does or says something that wasn’t meant to hurt us. Sometimes the person is responding from their
own hurt… lashing out at anyone close to them.
Sometimes because of sin… they are purposefully trying to hurt us… and
yet regardless of the reason for the hurt our response still needs to be the
same… Forgiveness. I don’t have to live
in the prison of bitterness… I can choose forgiveness every time because Jesus
has forgiven me.
“Indeed,
unforgiveness can have a powerful hold on us, strong enough to push people away
and keep them out there at a distance for years on end. But the power of
unforgiveness is power wasted, energy expended with little to show for all we’ve
invested in it. It is only the power of forgiveness that can truly keep us in
the flow of God’s will, at peace in the storm, carried along in the
ever-advancing river of His eternal plans and purposes for our lives—going
somewhere that means something.”
Lord,
forgive me for all the time and energy I have wasted on unforgiveness… holding
the other person captive in my own bitterness.
Whenever I try to bring them back into captivity remind me that I have
set them free… that I too am free from the prison of unforgiveness… help me to
walk in that freedom and the peace that is found when we have forgiven
others. Thank you for forgiving me and leaving
me an example to live out before others.
“Forgiveness
is a mighty tool in the hand of an all-powerful God to bring healing all
around, to every conceivable type of situation and relationship—past or present.”
Forgiveness
can bring about healing in the life of both the offended and the offender… that
is why it has so much power. When we forgive
others, we are displaying one of God’s greatest attributes… it is what led Jesus
to the cross to die on our behalf. It is
the reason we have hope, joy, peace, and life eternal. Forgiveness is powerful and does bring about
healing… I am beginning to see its effect on my own life. While this process cannot change the life of another
person it has been life changing for me… and for that I am forever grateful.
“The
speaker challenged her audience to treat past wrongs like a ‘record’—rather
than playing that record over and over again in their minds, she urged them,
‘Take the record of those wrongs and break it over your knee. Only then,’ she said, ‘will you be free and
able to love the ones who wronged you.’”
When
you have been hurt deeply the words and actions do tend to play over and over
again in your mind… you have to make and active choice to stop them… as the author
recommends to “break the record” so they can’t continue causing you pain. I have had to stop reading the hurtful things
that were said to me… and dwelling on the painful experiences we went
through. I have to live in the here and the
now… to look at the people God has blessed us with to fill the hole in our hearts
from those who are no longer part of our life.
Sometimes it is a matter of stopping those thoughts on a daily basis…
taking them “captive and make them obedient to Christ” (2 Cor 10:5). Satan wants nothing more but for me to be
defeated by my hurts… my pasts… my thoughts… but God will deliver me if I let Him
and choose to walk in obedience.
“Forgiveness
is not so much about us as it is about Him. Every opportunity you encounter to
practice forgiveness is an opportunity to draw attention to the God who so
delights to show mercy and to pardon sinners that He gave His only Son to make
is possible. When those around you see
you forgiving, when they hear your stories, when they watch for your reactions,
they may be seeing Christ in a way they’ve never known Him before. And they may be drawn to love, worship, and
trust that great ‘pard’ning God.’
Forgiveness is not just an act of obedience for obedience’s sake. Yes, we are commanded to forgive. But more than an obligation, forgiveness is a
high calling—an opportunity to be part of something eternal, to shower back our
gratitude to the One who forgave us everything.
Think of it as an offering, a sacrifice, a love gift to God… for Him and
Him alone. He is pleased and praised—that is reason and reward enough.”
Wow…
forgiveness isn’t just about me… it isn’t about my healing and being set free
(although that does take place when we forgive others) … it is about glorifying
God. We become a living example of
Christ to others… to the one we forgive and to those who are watching us
forgive… even if it didn’t bring about healing we should forgive for this
reason alone… out of obedience to Christ and to bring Him glory!
“To those
who don’t know better, forgiveness may seem like weakness—giving up, letting
evil triumph, letting the ‘bad guys’ win.
Calvary itself may seem to be just such a defeat… But seen from the vast
reaches of eternity, the cross actually spelled Satan’s ultimate defeat and
proved to be God’s greatest victory!”
Amen…
Jesus was not defeated on the cross… He chose to die on the cross… He humbled Himself
so He could rise up and forgive us of our sins.
I am alive today because of the cross…!
I can forgive today because of His example and the power of the cross.
Making it
Personal Questions: (Too personal to share specifics with everyone 😊 )
Is there a “record” you still need to break? By His grace, do it today.
Worship God for His amazing forgiveness and grace.
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