Graduation Day… Mixed Emotions...!

Graduation this year was full of mixed emotions… it was a busy year for graduation between my students who were graduating, D-group girls graduating, and my own graduation.    My emotions wavered between excitement, anticipation, joy, sadness, exhaustion, and grief.

As many of you know… I process my feelings through writing… and this is the first time I have sat down to write my feelings about everything I experienced during this time period… so bear with me as the emotions may overwhelm me again. 

On June 7^th, the day of my student’s graduation from TOP, I found out that one of my graduating seniors was in the hospital.  Jacenya was medically fragile and our goal for her had always been to make it to graduation… but this year she was doing so much better, so it wasn’t as much of a concern… so when she didn’t come to school that morning we were all in shock.  Immediately, I started talking to the other teachers about what our back up plan would be to honor her at graduation.  Around 2:30, I found out that she was on comfort care and would not make it out of the hospital.  Her para-educator and I immediately left to go visit her and her family at the hospital for a couple hours and got permission to come back graduation with some of the other staff members. 

While it was my honor to share about Jacenya at graduation… it was also probably one of the hardest things I have ever had to do… Jacenya was such a bright spot in our classroom and always brought joy to those around her… I knew that she wouldn’t want her memory to bring sorrow to graduation… so I wanted to honor her without the students knowing she was going to die… which meant that I could not cry.  After graduation, 15 or so of us went back to the hospital to celebrate Jacenya’s graduation with her family… she even opened her eyes one last time to see one of her crushes.  It was a bittersweet moment as we all said goodbye to Jacenya for the last time.  It is so hard to lose a life at such a young age… but her memory will be forever engraved in my heart… about an hour after leaving the hospital I got a text message that she had passed away.  I let a few staff members know at work since I had the next day off and would not be there to let everyone know. 

The next day, I had to pull it together for my own graduation.  Thankfully I had the day off to grieve in the morning and then shove my emotions aside before heading over to Ellensburg.  Of course, I let my professor know about Jacenya just in case I lost it during the ceremony.  Matthew and my parents went with me to watch me be hooded and celebrate my graduation.  

Picture in front of the Wild Cat

Parents came to support me... 

Matthew was my biggest support these last two years..!

Masters in Special Education..!

 It was a lot of fun to be able to meet some of my classmates and professors for the first time.  Doing an online masters program, you spend a lot of time talking online but it is a different experience when you finally meet them in person.  Two professors in particular that I was happy to meet was my master chair (the one I will have to defend in front of in July) and the former head of the Sped department who I took the majority of my classes with.  The only professor I knew previously was the one who was hooding me as she was part of the APT program that met on campus a few times a quarter.  

Special Education Cohort (Not shown was the literacy side)

View from my family... they had front row seats behind the graduates... 

Presenting my name... 

Being hooded

By Dr. Castillo... 

My Favorite Professor... 

Celebrating my success... 

Receiving my "diploma"

Formal Graduation Picture

I did it..!  

My Special Education Professors

Selfie with Dr Castillo

Thanks for you support Matthew..!

Graduation ended up being a lot of fun.  I was able to spend the time talking to my professor while we waited.  I do wish that I had completed my project before walking but am glad I didn’t have to wait until next summer to walk.  After the ceremony, we went out to a Mexican restaurant for dinner and then headed home.  

I thought the arms of the robe were weird... 

Dinner out with my parents... 

Graduation Dinner..!